the desert hasn't left me

I may have left the desert, but I don't think the desert will ever leave me.

It's been almost eleven months since the MEDEVAC. Most of the sand has been scrubbed out of my boots and uniforms. My friends seem to have settled back down into routines that civilians would deem normal. I enjoy the lack of several, sometimes strict, restrictions that I had lived under a year ago.

But, it's not uncommon for me to view the world through a veil of memories from the desert. Drifting snow reminds me of drifting sand. The sound of thunder takes a few seconds to register. And the recent summer rains? Mudstorms, hard packed sand, flooded streets and walkways -- not to mention the association to a few bad memories. The landscape from quick news clips of Iraq look all too familiar. Even the mental pictures I have of Ky and Aramis have a desert backdrop.

Honestly, I thought summer would help. I thought that having a lifestyle closer to what I was used to pre-deployment would help. I thought that being around friends and family would help.

I went away and came back a different person -- for better or worse -- and I don't think I'll ever be able to look at the world they way I used to.

I got the phone call

Today, I got the phone call.

The Army had declared me medically unfit for service, they decided that it was service-related, and it was determined that I would get 30% disability. But, even with all of that, I was still in the Army.

That phone call? It was to let me know that I've been put on the list of Warriors in Transition to be out-processed from the Army next month. Out. Done. Retired.

(Finally.)