in other news...

I have a new job, again. But this time it's very exciting. Why? Amoung the other various things that I get to do, part of my duties entail being the personal assistant to the Sergeant Major.

Going from being the invisible bass clarinetist to the Sergeant Major's personal assistant? Whoa, man. Whoa.

umm, yeah, by the way...

Ever have one of those times when you probably should have just kept your mouth shut? Yeah, definitely having one of those times. And a few awkward conversations have arisen because of it. Not saying that it's a good thing or a bad thing, because honestly, I don't even know yet.

you drank?

Rocky: I just got up. And this is early for me.
Techno: I know. I've had lunch already
Rocky: And on saturday, I was extremely drunk
Techno: you drank?
Rocky: I get that reaction a lot...

You have to know the two of us to really get it, but, I thought it was amusing.

Sometimes I miss him more than I'll care to admit. But things turned out okay. And he's still the best person to talk to about... whatever, really.

staff duty

Staff duty... the all-nighter for the Army crowd. Oh joy. Some places on this post really never do sleep.

The only good thing about it was that I was able to actually talk to a few people back home for more than 15 minutes. And that is always nice, even if I'm already in a really good mood.

snow!!

I called Fuzz this morning, and he said that it's snowing there. Snow! In October!

Meanwhile, it's bright and sunny and warm here. The same as always. How boring.

exile

They exiled me, where I'm working like a dog on various Spreadsheets of Doom and generally hating whomever thought that simplifying names of things would simplify the lives of anyone and everyone who deals with supply. You can feel the love, can't you? I'm supposed to be back to my regular job in a little more than a week.

not logical

I call the planetarium to check in -- the usual "hey, I'm still alive" bit -- and got to talk to Bossman.

Bossman: "PhysicsGeek told me something the other day, and I'd almost hate to ask, but..."
Techno: "Yeah, I made a grown man cry."

Then he played the dad role for a bit and listened to my explanation and assured me that everything would be okay. And I know it sounds weird, but we are his kids. And he is very much a father figure to me.

I just didn't think that I would be this upset after talking to him about it.

If I dumped him, why am I still so torn up about it?

note to self

It's probably not a good idea to listen to Legião Urbana when I'm having a bad day.

Não penso em me vingar
Não sou assim...
(1° de Julho - Legião Urbana)

mere symbols

I finally took off my ring this morning. It sat on my desk for a few minutes while I just stared at it. MeuAmor has been home all week, and I know he cried the last time I talked to him. He hasn't wanted to talk to me since. In reality, it's probably better that way -- all it does is make him upset. It's hard to describe the mix of emotions that I'm going through right now.

MeuAmor: "Do you still love me?"
Techno: "Yes."
MeuAmor: "Then why are we breaking? Why are you throwing two years into the trash?"
Techno: "Because sometimes, love just isn't enough."

Over the chatter of twenty-some other people on the MWR phones, he didn't hear me.

He doesn't understand. He'll probably never understand.

ARNEWS: Virginia National Guard eyes Web sites, blogs

The following is exactly why I don't mention a lot of specifics or post pictures.

WASHINGTON (Army News Service, Oct. 12, 2006) – Big Brother is not watching you, but 10 members of a Virginia National Guard unit might be.

The Manassas-based Virginia Data Processing Unit activated a team in July for one year to scan official and unofficial Army Web sites for operational security violations.

The team, which works under the direction of the Army Web Risk Assessment Cell, Army Office of Information Assurance and Compliance, notifies webmasters and blog writers when they find documents, pictures and other items that may compromise security.

The team uses several scanning tools to monitor sites for OPSEC violations. The tools search for such key words as “for official use only” or “top secret,” and records the number of times they are used on a site. Analysts review the results to determine which, if any, need further investigation.

(cut for length)

When a team member finds information that could be sensitive, he or she marks it for further investigation. Another team member reviews the item and determines if the webmaster or blog writer should be notified. Most notifications are made by e-mail, and the person responsible is given a few days to respond, depending on the severity of the issue.

When secret documents are found, the site owner is notified immediately by phone. Official sites are contacted through either the webmaster, or in some cases, the unit’s chain of command.

The most common OPSEC violations found on official sites are For Official Use Only (FOUO) documents and limited distribution documents, as well as home addresses, birthdates and home phone numbers.Unofficial blogs often show pictures with sensitive information in the background, including classified documents, entrances to camps or weapons. One Soldier showed his ammo belt, on which the tracer pattern was easily identifiable.

Although AWRAC contacts Soldiers who write unofficial blogs, the team does not review sites that lack public access. Team members identify themselves as AWRAC representatives, and work with a legal counsel to ensure their actions adhere to law and Army regulations.

(cut again for length)

next verse, same as the first

Every morning I wake up, get dressed, and go to work. I squint in the sun and kick the sand around, just to watch it billow up and blow away. My boots look like they've been dipped in flour. At breakfast I look for the fruit that's fairly close to ripe, but not overripe. Usually I eat alone -- I'm in too much of a hurry to sit and chat -- trying to make out what's going on in the news. I get on the bus, put on my headphones, and try to keep the sun out of my eyes. No one talks on the bus in the mornings. My stop comes up, I get off, and walk the rest of the way. Eyes wide open, right hand empty, walking with a sense of purpose and giving proper military courtesy to those who pass me. Approach my building, open the bay door, slide down to my desk, sit down and log in. And do... nothing. All day.

On a really hot day I try to stay inside while the sun is out. On a windy day I try to stay inside while the winds are rough. Basically, the only good time to go outside is at night. No sun, no heat. Just don't try to look up at the stars -- you can see hardly anything because of the light pollution. Orion and Taurus come out in the middle of the night; winter is coming. Not sure what that means, though. I keep expecting it to at least rain, but day after day the sky is cloudless.

The last time I called the planetarium Bossman asked if I had settled in yet. My days all blur together. Day after day it's the same routine. Wash, rinse, repeat. At least my body is getting the chance to recover from all of the abuse known as mobilization training.

It could be much, much worse. Blondie's base gets mortared, Sweetheart leaves the wire everyday. I sit in an office.

so sorry

Dear MeuAmor,

I'm sorry. So very sorry.

You probably won't understand.

I'm not asking you to.

a belated thank you

Dear MedicGeek, InfantryMedic, FratBoy, Sgt Playa, Sweetheart, and Lucky:

Thank you.

not a good time to be a part of my life

I have had way too much time to think. I have had way too much time to talk to other people. And it seems that whenever I tell someone about a certain incident, the more that they look at me and ask that same predictable question. Which makes me wonder about a lot of things.

And that takes me right back to that "I have had way too much time to think" part.

It is not a good time to be a part of my life.